9 Comments
User's avatar
Jess, The Creator's avatar

I’m curious about this one:

When you make a mistake, is your first instinct to learn from yourself—or criticize yourself?

There’s a difference between holding yourself accountable and becoming your own punishment.

What would change if you kept the standard, but removed the cruelty?

Lowcountry Wildfire 🔥's avatar

I get the distinction you’re making. A sharp, targeted self-critique can forge strength instead of just shame. You call yourself out, feel the sting, and refuse to let yourself off the hook. That discomfort becomes fuel to get better next time. Blanket self-attack is poison, but honest self-criticism has its place.

Wildfire 🔥

Dr Deborah Vinall's avatar

A question I often ask my clients is "whose voice does this sound like?" Too often it is an echo of a harsh parent. When we see that, we often become ready to let it go.

Jess, The Creator's avatar

I definitely hear my parent’s voice as my inner critic. It seems impossible to let go of!!

Dr Deborah Vinall's avatar

It's a process for sure. But like you wrote, we first have to become willing to release it.

Eladio Matos's avatar

Thanks for this awesome reminder, Jess. At times, we are our own worst critics.

Jess, The Creator's avatar

Thank you so much, Eladio! We all must be kinder to ourselves!

Chris B. Writes's avatar

Such an important topic, Jess. No one keeps worse score on ourselves than we do.

Jess, The Creator's avatar

Thank you so much, Chris! Yep we are our worst critic that’s for sure!